Coronavirus (COVID-19) Health and Safety Guide
ASERT has put together some resources for those with autism and those who care for people with autism relating to the current Coronavirus outbreak.
So the last thing I wrote about is how I often would observe things that people would do in a group conversation; which is something I do too often. Of course, it’s just because I do not know how to put myself in a group conversation at ANY time because I either come in way too loud or just leave myself out of the entire conversation…, but I stay in the area of conversation. I can’t say that I do not like staying silent in settings like these, but it sometimes gives me a lot of attention when I DO have an input on certain topics and I usually come up with an opinion that doesn’t lead to a yes or a no response.
At first, I really thought this was just some an unusual habit I had where I don’t really know how to answer something. But really, it comes off as a kind of behavior where I can comfortably help out, or just notice the little things around the environment whilst the conversation is ongoing. This left me to believe that possibly developing a neutral take in life has made me more aware of my surroundings.
I didn’t really like the fact that I would never have anything to say in certain conversations that had more than two people because I didn’t really think that what I had to say was worth hearing sometimes. Over time, I recognized that I was so focused on what was being said that either 1) what I said would come off as complete out of the conversation because it may come off tired, if it was a sit-down conversation or 2) give a response that seemed off, when it was just opinionated…, but either way, I didn’t understand what was happening until I got older and loved things like mental and literal (pencil and paper) note-taking.
However, I actually enjoy being the silent one sometimes…, to the point where I think that there’s almost nothing wrong with being left out. Being able to focus outside of what’s being discussed between the conversations outside of what I am directly involved in or just being able to have a say in what I think needs to be fixed to better improve what’s being said is a benefit to being the listener in conversations.
I have spent a good course of this year training to be a Certified (Autistic) Peer Specialist (CAPS). I have seen some benefits of doing it and didn’t mind being that person who gives his opinion whenever anyone’s interested. I think there will be times where I will learn how to speak up, but this was a huge learning lesson for me. If there’s a situation with an arguing conversation, and a statement is going to offend someone, then I will have to stand up and play my part…, but for the most part, I prefer to keep my statements like how I keep my life: relaxed and neutral.