Love is in the Air
I have experienced Valentine’s Day in February from the perspective of being single and also being in a romantic relationship. When I was single, I thought it would be amazing to have a date on Valentine’s Day and to be in a relationship. Boy, I was partly correct, but also way off. While it was nice to be in a relationship, it fundamentally didn’t change me as far as my level happiness or self confidence was concerned. What did change for me is that I had to think about another person and what that person might enjoy. This is a lot of work, especially around symbolic events such as Valentine’s Day. Sometimes it is easy to forget about all the other people and non-romantic relationships that are important to me.
As a single person, I do have lots of relationships that are important to me. February for me is about the connections that I have with these people. To be honest having good relationships skills doesn’t come naturally to me I had to be taught the social skills that I use everyday.
I can use my everyday social skills to make Valentines more enjoyable for me. For example making plans ahead of time for Valentines day with friends or family. Or if that doesn’t work out do something fun for yourself like getting a special treat. I try to avoid restaurants and other romantic places on Valentine’s Day. Most important keep a positive attitude your value has very little to do with if your in a romantic relationship or not.
The hardest thing for me in February and every month is to remember to love myself. It is hard not to want to change myself to fit someone else but for me that didn’t work. For February I’m going to work on accepting myself as I am now and valuing the people in my life. Wishing you a happy Valentine’s Day.