Executive functioning struggles

Executive functioning isn’t my strong point in life. I constantly find myself going “What do I need to do?” or forgetting about the things that I need to do. Forgetting or not doing something that I need to do can be embarrassing if not troublesome for me. It’s not that I’m lazy and it’s not that I’m not trying, it’s just that part of my brain doesn’t work well. What does work for me though is lists, keeping a calendar, and writing things down. Okay, so I’ve written things down, I have things scheduled on my calendar, now the next part is remembering to actually check my calendar and not to lose my lists.

 How about you? Do you struggle with organization and executive functioning? What works or doesn’t work for you? Well, this week I forgot about a meeting at work and I was so embarrassed. Thank goodness my boss is so understanding of me being occasionally scattered at work. I have one of the best jobs ever and I appreciate the flexibility and work hours. I appreciate the fact that I can work when it works for me.

 Now getting back to my ability to get distracted at a moment’s notice. Yes, it is very easy for me to get distracted and I find myself doing something that doesn’t need to be done when I should be tending to something more important. I wonder, is it procrastination or perhaps it’s my ADD causing me to become easily distracted. I’m not sure but right now I’m taking a break to walk around my apartment so that I don’t feel so stiff after sitting for a few hours.

Another thing I struggle with is my short-term memory and working memory. What I mean is that I easily forget things and it doesn’t take long for me to have no idea what somebody’s talking about unless I make an effort to record what I need or what I learned. This helps take care of the short term memory. What  I mean by working memory is being able to hold the concept in your mind and remember it long enough to accomplish a task in a short amount of time. My capacity to hold information is really small and it’s easily knocked out of commission by distractions.

I may sound frustrated as I’m a bit upset but I’ll get over it. Thank goodness it wasn’t that big of a deal missing the meeting by accident and I’ll be able to watch the recording of the meeting. However, having difficulty with my executive functioning, short-term memory, and working memory makes life more difficult and it means that I have to work harder. It brings to mind that quote from a monk that goes something like this:“Who told you that you were supposed to be perfect and that things were supposed to be easy?” I guess the thing is that everybody has their own struggles and things that are difficult for them. We might not even be aware of the other person’s struggles or difficulties unless it impacts us directly.

I guess the only thing I can do when somebody else’s difficulties impact me is to give them grace like my boss did today. I can also remember to give myself a little bit of slack but not too much since I still want to improve. To find the balance between not trying at all and trying to be perfect is quite difficult. Wishing my readers the best of luck in finding that delicate balance between not trying or giving up and trying to be “perfect.”