For me, Christmas is not about what you can buy or make for the season. For me, Christmas is all about relationships: family and friends spending time together learning what is important to them. It took me a long time to realize this fact and I’m still learning what it means to me.
I would love to say that spending time and learning about my family and friends comes easily to me. However, like a lot of people, it takes effort and doesn’t come naturally to me. There are lots of times when my anxiety and depression is so high that it causes misunderstandings with the people I care about. My family and friends are not perfect either, so they understand most of the time.
I do enjoy this time of year but I also struggle a lot more with my depression and anxiety. There are times that all I want to do is hide in an empty room and not come out because I feel like I don’t belong. I feel this way but I know that if I hide, it makes it even harder to interact with others. I always try my best to look happy and fit in with everyone but I’m not very good at hiding my feelings or acting. I often wonder how many people put on “masks” and try to act happy, especially this time of year.
If you’re struggling and having a hard time for whatever reason, you are not alone as there are lots of people who struggle. Sometimes it helps to remind myself that nothing lasts forever, especially the really tough moments. I also try to replace my difficult thoughts with thoughts of what makes me happy, which is not the easiest thing to do, but it definitely helps. I haven’t found one answer that fixes everything and I don’t think I will. I have discovered a few coping strategies that help me in many situations. I would say that for me, Christmas is about family, friends, and continuing to try my best.
Wishing you a great holiday season!